Wednesday, 8 July 2009

The folly of age

Another phenomenon you can see everywhere in Liverpool:

Old men wearing baseball hats.

When I say 'old men', I don't mean 100 year old grave-dodgers perilously close to death shuffling down the high street at 0.000001mph. What I am actually referring to those late 60s/early 70s grey haired fools you see on the number 10 bus every day. I'm fairly sure these pricks are retired and spend most of their time smoking themselves stupid in horrible boozers on Kensington, but where did the hat thing come from?

They're sure as shit not wearing them to stop the sun getting in their eyes because today the sky was blacker than Mordor. It's not even because their heads get cold (it was bloody warm this afternoon). Have they seen their idiotic, car-stealing sons and thought "I know. I want to be just like him. Instead of enjoying my retirement I shall spend all day in William Hill and cough myself to death from smoking 80 a day."

I don't know. I just don't know.

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